Black Permanent Marker

This morning I was in the kitchen, Emily was napping, and Lauren was watching TV in the playroom. I was talking on the phone and Lauren came looking for me, and as is the norm, I heard her before I saw her. When I saw her, I nearly had a heart attack. I couldn't see much Lauren, just lots of black permanent marker all over her clothes and any exposed skin. As I'm trying to wrap my brain around what she's done, I follow her into the playroom and see the same black permanent marker all over our leather chair, ottoman, and very light beige carpet. Off to the side of the chair are stacks of videos, note pads, and note cards. Lauren figured out how to get the child lock off the cabinet in the playroom, emptied it of its contents, and found the marker box containing the permanent marker. She bypassed the washable markers for the one permanent marker in the box and went to work. She was so proud of herself. "Look at my work job, Mom! Don't mess it up!" Standing there, I try to decide what to tackle first: Lauren, the carpet, or the furniture. I started on the furniture, then gave up and put Lauren in the bathtub to soak. I was scrubbing Lauren with exfolliating gel and she was screaming, "The sprinkles are hurting me." when my phone rang. It was my mom, who should be teaching first graders, not calling me in the middle of the day. As soon as I answered, she asked if I was watching the weather and informed me that we were in the path of a tornado. I just had to laugh. One child is in the bathtub covered in marker and a layer of exfoliating gel, the other child is calling "Mama, Mama, Mama" over and over from her crib, my playroom is a permanent marker mess, and a tornado might be headed toward my house. I rinse Lauren off, she is now a dull black, rather than shiny black, and head to the playroom to watch the weather. We're ok, but to south of us there is extensive damage. It is a good reminder that carpet and leather furniture are just things that can be replaced. Can you imagine how boring my life would be without Lauren?